Should they see someone to talk about it?

Grief and loss are universal human experiences that affect individuals of all ages, including children. The emotional impact of losing a loved one or experiencing significant life changes can be profound for young ones, and it is crucial for caregivers and society to provide support during these challenging times.

According to statistics, around 5-10% of children will experience the death of a parent or a sibling before the age of 16. However, it is essential to remember that grief extends beyond the loss of a family member and can include other significant life events such as divorce, relocation, or separation from loved ones.

Children’s understanding of death and their ability to process grief varies based on their age and developmental stage. Younger children may struggle to comprehend the permanence of loss, while older children may experience complex emotions and engage in more mature expressions of grief..

During the grieving process, children may exhibit a range of emotional and behavioural responses that are considered normal and part of their journey toward healing. However, there are some symptoms that, when persistent or severe, may indicate a need for additional support or professional intervention.

Checklist to See if Grief or Loss is Impacting Your Child

Check the symptoms below to see if your child may require additional support:

Prolonged intense grief, this can manifest as persistent sadness, feelings of hopelessness, or an inability to engage in normal activities for an extended period.

Significant changes in behaviour, such as increased aggression, withdrawal from social interactions, or a decline in academic performance, may indicate that they are having difficulty adjusting to the loss and need additional support.

Persistent sleep disturbances, including nightmares, insomnia, or excessive sleeping, can be indicative of unresolved grief and may require professional attention.

Drastic changes in appetite or weight, such as significant weight loss or gain, can be a cause for concern and may warrant intervention.

Preoccupation with death. If a child consistently expresses thoughts or engages in conversations about death, self-harm, or wanting to be with the deceased, it is crucial to take these statements seriously and seek professional help.

Regression in developmental milestones, children who experience a loss may exhibit regression in their developmental milestones. For instance, a previously toilet-trained child may begin wetting the bed, or a school-aged child may revert to baby talk or clinginess.

Persistent physical complaints. If a child frequently complains of physical ailments (e.g., headaches, stomachaches) without any apparent medical cause, it may be an expression of emotional distress related to the loss.

What Should You Do?

It is essential to recognise the unique needs of grieving children. It is crucial to provide a nurturing and compassionate environment to help them heal. Encouraging open dialogue and active listening allows children to express their emotions and ask questions without judgment. Maintaining familiar routines and consistency can offer a sense of stability and security during times of upheaval. Additionally, providing access to support groups or therapy can be valuable, as children may benefit from connecting with peers who have experienced similar losses or working with trained professionals such as psychologists who specialise in childhood grief. Remember, each child’s grief journey is unique, and it is important to respect their individual pace and provide ongoing support as they navigate their emotions and find healthy ways to remember and honour their loved ones. If you find it difficult to implement these tips, you may benefit from support from a psychologist.

If your child is struggling with grief or loss or would like some additional support, please contact Creating Change on 8883 3185 to book an appointment with a psychologist who can provide you with the guidance and support you need.

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If you are experiencing thoughts of suicide, contact crisis support services such as Lifeline (13 11 14), the Kids Helpline (1800 55 1800) or the NSW Mental Health Line (1800 011 511).

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