Have challenges in your life set you back, and you’re struggling to soldier on?
Do you find when things go wrong or don’t turn out how you’d expect, it’s hard to remain optimistic?
We all go through challenges in life that may be overwhelming, exhausting and demanding. Life is messy. Sometimes you need that little extra push to get what you want, or to where you want to be. Why then do we often let these small roadblocks in our day-to-day life flatten our mood, ruin our day and create that flow on effect?
Creating your Vision
To perpetually work towards what matters you must visualise, plan, adapt. “It’s not that easy!” you say. It can be a challenge to remain optimistic when things don’t go the way you envisioned, but everything great in life requires a little bit of persistence. There is often a misconception that you’ll only feel good once you have what you want. But the truth is, you can choose to feel good right now. Have a think – how realistic are your expectations? Do small things ruin your day – is it worth it?
Do you feel like you are pretending?
Sometimes believing that you are in a good mindset really isn’t enough – you feel like you’re pretending. Our emotions may be taking us on another journey. By paying direct attention to your emotions, we increase awareness, accept what we feel and can create intentions that will guide you in the direction you want to go. Alternatively, having a negative way of thinking will evidently result in dwelling, procrastination and avoidance.
Think about a time when you’ve purchased a coffee first thing in the morning. If the milk is burnt or the barista forgot your sugar (or it was simply bad coffee!), your reaction can bring a negative vibe. This may carry on and ruin the entire day. For the remainder of your day, you may fixate on why everything is going wrong. It’s probably something you don’t even realise you do, because your routine is fixated into your body as muscle memory, or unconscious behaviors.
Take Some Time Out
When the pressure from the world gets too much, and you experience a major setback, have some time out. Evidence shows that valuing solitude (time for yourself) doesn’t really hurt your social life, in fact, it might add to it. Solitude helps you regulate your emotions. It can have a calming effect that prepares us to think more clearly and better engage with others. Taking some time for yourself can also bring clarity, to help you to understand the origins of your emotions and why you react to certain situations. Through changing your awareness and the way you think, act and feel, you could turn around your bad day into only a temporary setback, leading to a much more fulfilling life.
Energy and effort are contagious!
Take some time for you. Surround yourself with people who have similar values and are working hard to stay focused – people who are feeling more positive than you are. When you spend more time with people who add value to your life and elevate your mood, you’ll begin to adopt encouraging thinking patterns.
Written By Rebecca Deane– Clinical Psychologist – www.creatingchange.net.au